Jared Fogle Can’t Ask Judge to Recuse Herself Just Because She’s a Parent

Jared Fogle just got served another big L in court — his request to have a judge booted from his case just because she’s a mom was denied. An Indiana appeals court turned thumbs down on Fogle’s motion to have Judge Tanya Walton Pratt removed from…

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A Parody of Adele’s ‘Hello’ That Any Parent Can Appreciate

Moms can’t make phone calls. The minute a mom picks up the phone, her children will come running from the four corners of the house to ask her questions, scream, yell, fight — basically do anything in their power to prevent her from talking on the phone. They will drop everything the minute they hear her say, “Hello?” So if you ever want to get your kids’ attention, pick up the phone. Or sit down. Or use the bathroom.

When I saw Adele’s amazing new “Hello” video, and watched her struggle to try and make a phone call, I immediately thought of the plight of moms, and a new parody was born. We can’t make phone calls. We can’t pee alone. We’re constantly losing our minds in the mayhem of motherhood. So ta-da — here’s my latest video!

Enjoy, and subscribe to the MyLifeSuckers YouTube channel!

Also on HuffPost:

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
ENTERTAINMENT NEWS-Visit Mobile Playboy today for the hottest adult entertainment online!

A Parody of Adele’s ‘Hello’ That Any Parent Can Appreciate

Moms can’t make phone calls. The minute a mom picks up the phone, her children will come running from the four corners of the house to ask her questions, scream, yell, fight — basically do anything in their power to prevent her from talking on the phone. They will drop everything the minute they hear her say, “Hello?” So if you ever want to get your kids’ attention, pick up the phone. Or sit down. Or use the bathroom.

When I saw Adele’s amazing new “Hello” video, and watched her struggle to try and make a phone call, I immediately thought of the plight of moms, and a new parody was born. We can’t make phone calls. We can’t pee alone. We’re constantly losing our minds in the mayhem of motherhood. So ta-da — here’s my latest video!

Enjoy, and subscribe to the MyLifeSuckers YouTube channel!

Also on HuffPost:

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Comedy – The Huffington Post
ENTERTAINMENT NEWS-Visit Mobile Playboy today for the hottest adult entertainment online!

Style Notes: Karl Lagerfeld’s Kids Collection is Here; Zara’s Parent Company Has Already Made $1 Billion in 2015


Style stories to know.

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What Your Job Is When You’re A Parent

After two sisters in their 20s claim that their self-loathing and mental health issues stem from their tumultuous childhood, Dr. Phil steps in to help the entire family move forward.

He tells the parents, who refute the daughters’ accusations: “You two as parents have a job when these kids are growing up, and it’s to create an environment where these children feel safe. It’s to create an environment where they learn about who they are. If they’re scared, instead of venturing out they start turning inward. And when they turn inward and start to isolate, then that’s when things can get really bad.”

Dr. Phil continues: “You say you reacted to a lot of what they did. Your job as parents is to act, not to react. Your job is to be leaders.”

Leonard, the father, admits that he had a tough disciplinary style — which Dr. Phil calls a “bull in a china shop approach” — with his two girls. “I know, I have my regrets,” says Leonard. “I want to do better. I love them. People make mistakes, they do. And some of them are unforgivable.”

Dr. Phil suggests that Leonard’s daughters might be more forgiving if they saw a change in behavior. “It’s hard to forgive someone for running over your foot if they keep running over your foot,” he explains.

He tells both parents, “You have a lot of re-parenting to do. To do that you need to learn some new skills. You made some real mistakes.”

To rebuild a relationship with your child, start with these five core parenting tips.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Dr. Phil – The Huffington Post

What Your Job Is When You’re A Parent

After two sisters in their 20s claim that their self-loathing and mental health issues stem from their tumultuous childhood, Dr. Phil steps in to help the entire family move forward.

He tells the parents, who refute the daughters’ accusations: “You two as parents have a job when these kids are growing up, and it’s to create an environment where these children feel safe. It’s to create an environment where they learn about who they are. If they’re scared, instead of venturing out they start turning inward. And when they turn inward and start to isolate, then that’s when things can get really bad.”

Dr. Phil continues: “You say you reacted to a lot of what they did. Your job as parents is to act, not to react. Your job is to be leaders.”

Leonard, the father, admits that he had a tough disciplinary style — which Dr. Phil calls a “bull in a china shop approach” — with his two girls. “I know, I have my regrets,” says Leonard. “I want to do better. I love them. People make mistakes, they do. And some of them are unforgivable.”

Dr. Phil suggests that Leonard’s daughters might be more forgiving if they saw a change in behavior. “It’s hard to forgive someone for running over your foot if they keep running over your foot,” he explains.

He tells both parents, “You have a lot of re-parenting to do. To do that you need to learn some new skills. You made some real mistakes.”

To rebuild a relationship with your child, start with these five core parenting tips.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Dr. Phil – The Huffington Post

The Most Important Thing About Dating as a Single Parent

When it comes to dating as a single parent, there is one single most important thing to consider, above everything else:

Would you allow your potential partner to date your child?
Or in other words, is your potential partner good enough for your kids?

Time and time again, I see women and men dating people who don’t exactly cut it.

The man whose girlfriend treats him like a bank account and handyman.

The woman whose boyfriend treats her like a “sidepiece” and inconvenience.

The scenarios are the same for those in LGBT relationships– situations in which one person is settling for less than what they deserve.

Time and time again, I see divorced parents in relationships that aren’t the dream relationship they left their ex’s for.

I see people settling. I see people dating fill-in’s and warm bodies to keep the loneliness at bay.

But if I were to ask any of these people, “Would you let this person date your child? Is this the type of partner you would want your kid to have as an adult?”

The answer is usually hell– no!

But why do we want more for our kids but less than for ourselves?

Why is it okay for you to date beneath you but not your child?

How do you expect your child to honor him or herself in adult relationships, if you cannot do the same thing?

How can you expect your child to raise the bar high if your bar is already so low?

They came from you. If you aren’t good enough well then, your children may draw the conclusion that perhaps maybe they aren’t either.

This is why I am single. I cannot afford to set the bar low on my child’s watch. If I set the bar low, so will she.

Until I find someone who honors me the way I should be, I will go solo.

So when you go out there to date as a single parent remember this: your children are watching.

Set the bar high.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

What It Is Like Having an LGBT Parent: Let’s Get the Facts Straight

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My father told me he was gay when I was 13. He said he had known ever since he was a little boy. Growing up Catholic in North Carolina during the 1960s did not present the most welcoming of circumstances for a gay man. For a lot of people, it is difficult to understand how a gay man could marry a woman and have children, but it is a lot more common than one might think. Most of my girlfriends are ecstatic when I tell them I have a gay dad; most of my guy friends are uncomfortable. For me, it’s a fact of life.

First, let me explain to you what it is not: It does not just mean I have a “cool dad” who goes shopping with me and that we get our nails done together (although, occasionally, we do).

This is what it is like: Harnessing my anger when I hear about hate crimes against the LGBT community and crying when I hear about LGBT kids committing suicide because of bullying. Biting my tongue (not often successfully,) when someone tells me that being gay, transgender, bisexual, etc. is “wrong, immoral or sick.” Watching the confused look on a person’s face when I try to explain why my dad stayed in the closet for 20 years and started a family as a straight man. Feeling hurt and frustrated when people actually believe gays set bad examples for their kids and being teased in grade school and, at that time, feeling ashamed. Have you ever tried to explain to someone that your stepdad is your father’s husband?

I fight against the ignorance because I know what it is actually like having a gay dad: wonderful. I adore watching him love my stepdad fully and wholeheartedly, no differently than two straight people would. Having a married gay dad means I get to have not only one intelligent, warm-hearted dad, but two. My dad, as a writer and advocate for the LGBT community, has become a resource and beacon of hope for lesbians and gays all around the world enduring the same struggle he did, and he encourages them to be open about who they are. As for changes in my life? I have become accepting and welcoming of all, regardless of how different they may be from me.

The relationship my father and I have today did not come easily, but it sure was worth it. Through a lot of counseling, tears and love, he became not only a better parent but a best friend. I am not sure if we became closer because he came out of the closet, but by showing his authentic self, our bond strengthened. He does not fit the so-called stereotypical “gay man,” but we certainly do enjoy our lunch dates and nights out on the town together. Our relationship is no different than any other good father and daughter bond. He still calls me every so often to make sure I am focusing on my studies, taking care of myself and staying away from bad boys and parties. (Sorry, Dad.)

Having a gay dad is so much more than meets the eye, but I would not have it any other way, and in fact I couldn’t. At forty-three years of age, I’m glad he finally figured that out too.

Marisa’s father writes at The Authentic Life

A revised edition of this article appeared on Odyssey.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.




Gay Voices – The Huffington Post

Chemistry.com gay - First Date 300x250

What It’s Really Like to Date a Single Parent

I’ve read several articles lately about why men should date single mothers, and I agree with all of them. Single moms are often resilient, selfless beings who put others’ needs before their own — great qualities to seek out in a partner to be sure. Due to personal experience, I also know that there is some hesitance in the dating world when it comes to dating a single parent, and can I just say — I get it.

In the spirit of full disclosure, you should know that I’ve never liked dating. Not when I was a teenager. Not when I was in college. And especially not now that I’m divorced. To be clear, I like the part where you find one person who you enjoy spending time with and talking to on a regular basis. I do not like going on countless first dates, agonizing over what to wear, what to say, how not to spill food on myself and then replaying the date in my head for days afterward analyzing the highlights (or low points).

Dating as a single parent is a whole different game — one that is played in a foreign language and where the rules are made up as you go along. In addition to the normal dating woes, there are other factors (and people) to consider. If you are contemplating dating a single parent, be prepared to encounter the following:

The stars will need to align for a date to happen: Ok, this is an exaggeration, but dating a single parent requires a little more planning and advanced notice than you might be used to. If I’m not going out on a Wednesday night or every other weekend (and I know this is a luxury not afforded to every single parent), I have to arrange for a sitter. It will also have to be an evening when there are no tee-ball games or VBS or birthday parties. Spontaneity, while thrilling, doesn’t really have a place in my life these days (unless it’s a Wednesday or every other weekend).

We value our time: This is true for most people, I know, but I’ve found myself getting more upset over canceled or rescheduled dates as a single parent than I ever did before. Why? My kid-free time is limited and precious. I try to cram as much into this time as possible — friend dates, grocery trips, cleaning, house projects, work projects — you get the idea. If I have carved out time for a date, that means that I’ve probably put several other things on hold. While the occasional cancelation is inevitable, the habitual canceler will likely be dropped from the calendar.

We come with some (pretty cute) baggage: You think this would go without saying, but I’m going to go ahead and say it anyway — single parents, by definition, have kids. And they’re our top priority regardless of who we’re dating. While a potential suitor won’t be meeting my kids on the first date (or several thereafter), my adorable redheads are going to make their way into my thoughts and my conversations, so if you don’t want to hear about my son’s obsession with baseball or my genius daughter’s recent spelling and counting achievements, then I’m not a match for you. In addition, if we’ve been dating for awhile and you show no interest in meeting my kids, that, too, will raise red flags.

There might be some not-so-cute baggage: Most of the time breakups mean you don’t have to see your ex ever again (except maybe for that unfortunate run-in at Starbucks or the grocery). With single parents, though, that is often not the case. Although I am my children’s primary caregiver, they also have a father who is present in their lives. He sees them weekly and attends extra-curricular activities. There’s no way around the fact that he is and will continue to be a part of my life. While my relationship with my ex is civil, others are not so lucky. Regardless, dating a single parent might mean that you will have to encounter the ex, a task that, understandably, not everyone is up for.

So to the men and women who know they are not ready to tackle dating a single parent, I say, “thank you.” You are saving yourself, another human, and (possibly) some little ones from wasted time and hurt feelings. If you’re up to the challenge, though, dating a single parent can be extremely rewarding (I’m not biased or anything). Some of the best people I know are single parents. In any case, this blog isn’t meant to scare you but instead to prepare you for, and perhaps enlighten you to, the uncharted territory that is dating a single parent.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.



Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Diddy Arrested For Serving UCLA Football Coach The Angry Parent Fade

Diddy and his infamous temper have struck again, bad boys and girls.

As you all know, the son of Hip-Hop’s richest attraction is a football player for UCLA and his dad wants to him thrive and flourish on the field.

Earlier today (June 22), a verbal disagreement between Puff and a UCLA football coach transpired and well, let’s just say, he treated him like Drake.

Via TMZ:

P. Diddy has been arrested for allegedly getting into a fight with a football coach at UCLA … where his son is on the team, TMZ Sports has learned.

We’re told Campus Police took the music mogul into custody early Monday afternoon. Diddy’s son, Justin Combs, is a defensive back on the team. We’re told the fight went down at the UCLA athletic facility.

One source says an assistant coach was screaming at Justin on the field. At some point later, we’re told Diddy confronted the coach in his office and grabbed him. Diddy was arrested for assault.

A source connected with Diddy tells TMZ Diddy himself initially wanted to call police, but the phone was taken out of his hands.
Diddy is still in custody at campus jail.

What’s the chances this will hurt Justin’s playing time next season?

And what’s good with those anger management classes?


Photo: Instagram / Diddy

The post Diddy Arrested For Serving UCLA Football Coach The Angry Parent Fade appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

Hip-Hop Wired

Happy Father’s Day to My Male-Identified Lesbian Parent

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We haven’t always gotten along. In fact, we have had more than our fair share of turbulent years. Stepparenting my brother and I couldn’t have been easy, and there weren’t a lot of other lesbian parents back in the 1970s and ’80s to talk to about it.

Perhaps I fought with you because it was easy — much safer to hurt your feelings than my mother’s or my biological father’s. Perhaps I fought with you because that’s what kids and parents do when they are struggling to balance independence and responsibility. But you always encouraged my dreams, and you always wanted me to be my best self, just like you do for my children.

But one thing I know for sure — no matter what I said or did, you would never go away. There was so many things you couldn’t control, like the simple fact that you were in a same-sex relationship at a time in America when that was abhorred. You couldn’t make us happy, because happiness comes from within. But you could control if you stayed or left, and you always stayed.

I think sometimes life is harder than we think it will be when we are children. I know parenting is harder than I thought it would be. But you managed the most important aspect of parenting — you gave me security. No matter, what, I knew you would love me anyway. No matter what, you would help me if I was in trouble.

I have been poor, depressed, or sick at varying times in my life, and I always knew if I asked, you would be there. Even if you were sick, or hated my spouse, or thought I was making a mistake, you would do whatever you could to help me.

That is the kind of unconditional love we all talk about. It’s not about agreeing about everything, or liking to do the same sorts of activities. It’s about knowing that no matter what, the people who love you will always be there, in good times and bad, sickness and health. Words that we say so often and rarely mean. There is no “unless” in the way you love me — you will love me no matter what mistakes I make or pain I cause. And I have relied on that love more than I have ever admitted, and my children do, too. I see how much they love you, and how gentle and patient you are with them.

So Happy Father’s Day, Pat. I love you, too.

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Gay Voices – The Huffington Post

Chemistry.com gay - First Date 300x250

5 Rules for Dating as a Single Parent

It took me three years after my separation (two, post-divorce) to feel comfortable and complete enough in my own skin and start dating seriously.

It didn’t take that long for me to date, obviously, but I hadn’t been pursuing dating with the idea of finding another long-term partner. It’s normal to feel free and giddy and ready for the love and affection we need, after a rough-and-tumble divorce. Marital breaks don’t occur overnight, chances are you’ve gone through quite a long time not getting your needs met far before your divorce occurred. I know many people who started dating around before their divorce was even final, but typically not with wedding bells in mind.

When you’re at a point where you are looking seriously for a long-term partner (or if you’ve happened to fall into that situation without even trying), there are a few guidelines that may make the transition easier for you and your kids.

Get to know each other, alone, first.

Often, alone time isn’t easy to come by for a single parent. However, it’s crucial that you spend the first few weeks (or, better, months) dating privately before introducing your new significant other to your children. Get to know each other one-on-one, make sure you’re a good fit for each other and this relationship has a future before involving your kids’ emotions. Be careful to not mistake the initial attraction and puppy love for real, long-term compatibility.

Take your time.

Take into account the seriousness of your children meeting your significant other. Your children may feel hesitant. They may be jealous that someone else is taking your time away from them. They may be worried about ‘betraying’ their other parent by liking your new beau. They may feel it’s risky to invest their feelings when they’re not sure if this is a long-term arrangement. They may be worried that your new partner won’t like them, or that they won’t like your partner. Take your time and ease into this major transition with your children, keeping all lines of communication open.

Make the initial meeting as low-stress as possible.

Do something fun and low-stress together. Go to a playground, catch a baseball game, hit up Chuck E. Cheese. Take the kids somewhere they’ll have fun, and let them ease into meeting the new person in your life. Children tend to learn and adapt best through play – incorporate that throughout the first few meetings with your new significant other and the transition will ease into place more naturally.

Don’t force it.

Let your children help dictate the speed that you all get to know each other. The last thing you want to do is strain your relationship with your kids, so take it slowly and be mindful of how everyone seems to be adapting. Keep the lines of communication open both with and without your significant other involved. At first your children may not feel comfortable opening up while someone new is present, but that doesn’t mean they’ll always feel that way. While your children should not be allowed to dictate your dating life, their opinions and input should be considered and respected. Don’t force them into a new relationship with your partner. Be patient with them while they adapt.

If you break up, give your children a safe place to feel sad.

A break-up is a situation that your kids don’t have any control over. While it’s not a good idea to stay in a bad relationship because of your children, it’s important to understand they will feel a sense of longing and loss for your partner, just as you may.

Talk to your kids and make sure they feel safe confiding their feelings about the situation to you. Don’t draw it out, and don’t talk to them until you’re absolutely sure things are final. There’s nothing worse than telling your kids it’s over and then having to say it’s not. If the break is final, be gentle with your children about it, and allow them to be sad. Feel comfortable sharing your own sadness with them as well; it’s okay for your children to see you’re human and dealing with the same sense of loss they feel.

Introducing someone new (or potentially a few new people if your partner has children) into your family unit doesn’t have to be a mess. If you’re both willing to take things slowly and keep communication open, you’ll have better luck with the transition in the long run.

What strategies have worked for you? Leave a comment below!

Kasey Ferris is a freelance writer and mother-of-five. She eats too many Oreos and thinks life is much better when you’re laughing. Find her at facebook.com/KaseyFerrisWrites.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Paul McCartney Explains Why He Doesn’t Smoke Marijuana Anymore: “It’s Now a Parent Thing”

Paul McCartneyPaul McCartney isn’t afraid to admit he’s smoked some marijuana over the years.

But as his children and grandchildren have grown older (and likely wiser), The Beatles member…


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A Tribute to Single Parent Moms

Maggie went from shelter to shelter with her children, always encouraging them to do their best, finding any kind of job to support them, encouraging her son to pursue his artistic talents, finding a big sister for her daughter and finally a mentor who could help her daughter obtain a scholarship to school. This mom never made the children her confidantes.

Sally suffered from a mental illness with rapid onset of symptoms. She was a wonderful mother who conveyed to her former husband her need to call on him if he needed to get the children when she began to feel ill.

Elizabeth drove her former partner to chemotherapy every week and when her children’s father was hospitalized, she drove the children to see him. She did this despite her former husband making embarrassing, false comments about her in their community.

Their strength and courage are examples of loving their children more than retaliating against their co-parent, attributing positive qualities to someone who continued to try to hurt them, accepting their own challenges and counting on the children’s co-parent to help them.

On a large scale, we know that women still earn less income than men on average, often have to go back to school post separation in order to succeed in the working world after being a stay-at-home mom. There are losses that moms (and dads) experience that are rekindled at times that were celebrations in the past, such as Mother’s Day. They may not wake up on Mother’s Day to their children bringing them breakfast in bed. In contrast perhaps to past celebrations where cards and gifts were a given, there may be nothing, retriggering that loss and tapping this mom on the shoulder with “What makes you think I am going to be nice to you now?”

The women we pay tribute to share important factors in common:

• They take responsibility for their lives-for moving forward and at their pace, reestablishing themselves in relationships, with family and careers in ways they never dreamt they could do

• They love their children and demonstrate through their behaviors their love and commitment by working all day, driving their children to music, sports and school activities, shopping at consignment stores so that their children can have some new change of seasons clothes

• They stop to laugh and do a silly activity together

• They understand their role in their adult relationship and work to make changes to improve their self esteem

• They remember that their children’s co-parent is an integral part of their children’s lives
You may not be at the point that the women described above are, and that is alright. You can get there. It takes time, support and hard work. What can help you get there and begin a healthier path of healing and growing?

Grieve. Allow yourself to mourn the losses of the relationship you once had and wanted it to be. Losses involve a lot of different emotions that need to be expressed in a healthy way so that people don’t get stuck in anger or depression.

Seek connections with others who understand how you feel, accept you where you are and support the steps you want to take to grow and help you get there.

Take a break from the stresses in life; give your children a break, too, and do something fun with them. You don’t have to spend a fortune of money on having fun — it could be sleeping in a tent in your backyard and making s’mores. It could be a barbeque with friends. Put aside all the distractions in your life, the electronics, the mounds of paperwork and just find time to just “be” with your children.

Make a conscious decision to work on yourself rather than continuing to criticize and destroy your former partner who is still your child’s parent.

Always, always give yourself credit for all that you do, all that you are, including your children’s loving mom.

With best wishes for a Happy Mother’s Day!

Risa Garon

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Voluntary Parent Tests

Humorists have often pointed out that you need a license to go fishing but you don’t need a license to create a human being and ruin its life through bad parenting.

I can’t imagine my government requiring a license for parenting, no matter how sensible the idea sounds. To do so would be incompatible with basic freedom.

But what about a voluntary test for parents?

I think you would see immense social pressure for newlyweds to pass a voluntary parenting test whenever children are in the plan. At first the test would be a novelty and I imagine it would generate ridicule. But in time it could become the first question anyone asks when you announce your engagement. “Did you both pass the parenting test?”

The government could offer tax incentives for anyone who passes the parenting test. That would be a good investment for the country because better parenting is probably good for the economy in the long run.

Another thing I would like to see is kids writing reviews of their own parents. All you need is a Yelp-like service for reviewing parents, with a twist that the reviews are NOT public. Only approved professionals (doctors, therapists, teachers, other experts) would see the reviews. This allows experts to jump in with some useful parenting advice for both the kids and their parents. My healthcare provider, Kaiser Permanente, would be ideal for such a service. They’re big on preventative care.

And imagine Big Data someday helping you set child “consequence” levels. For example, if Big Data says taking away a teens phone for three days gets a good result but taking it away for a month just makes things worse, that would be good to know. And it would be easier for parents to defend a punishment as "fair” if Big Data supports it. A parent will still need to adjust his or her strategy for the personality of the child, but it is useful to have a starting point.

And here’s a suggestion for helping low-income kids get a leg up. Imagine a law that says any child born into a household below a certain income level can be voluntarily matched up with two mentors from high income families. And let’s imagine there is an online service for making those matches. And one can imagine the government offering tax incentives for folks who are part of a successful mentoring arrangement.

The future of parenting, I hope, is voluntary parenting tests, Yelp-like reviews of parents (non-public, to invite professional intervention), Big Data to guide parenting strategy, and a voluntary mentoring program for low-income kids that is supported by tax incentives.

Would any of those ideas work?

——— In other news ————

Cyborg rats with brain implants are here! But let’s not make cyborg rats that are too smart, okay? That has trouble written all over it.

And how about the self-driving car that went across the country 99% unaided? Maybe it’s just me, but I have lots of questions about the 1%.

And finally someone is making a running boot that does some of the running for you. But only 7% of it. I can’t wait for them to get the other 93% done so I can do some serious sleep walking.

—————————————–


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Chris Brown — Baby Mama’s BF … Step Aside Breezy, I’ll Parent Royalty

The boyfriend of Chris Brown’s baby mama is hitting Chris where it hurts most … fatherhood. King Ba dumped Nia Guzman after he learned her 9-month-old baby was fathered by Brown. But we’ve learned they’re back together, and Ba is treating Royalty like…

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Woman Tells Sister She Should Parent Violent Child, Not Medicate

Kim and Ryan say they are terrified of their 7-year-old son, Rylan, whose imaginary friend “Bleeder” threatens to kill them. “My biggest fear is that we’re raising a school shooter, a mass murderer, a serial killer,” says Kim. Watch their story here.

Rylan has spent nearly half of his life in hospitals, and has been on a long list of medications to treat him — a course of action with which Kim’s sister, Stacy, does not agree.

“They have constantly put him in hospitals and medicated him rather than actually raising him and showing him unconditional love and structure,” says Stacy. “She would rather drop him off at a hospital and have him medicated rather than parenting him. Whenever he does act up, they give him another pill, call the police, sedate him.”

She adds, “When I talk to Kim about what she’s doing with Rylan, she doesn’t want to acknowledge that she could be making a mistake. She’s very defensive.”

Kim and her ex-husband Ryan disagree vehemently. “That’s so far from the truth,” says Kim.

“Walk a mile in our shoes,” adds Ryan.

Watch the video above as the family gets candid with one another about this challenging situation, and see what happens when Dr. Phil steps in on Tuesday’s show.

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Dr. Phil – The Huffington Post

The Parent Pact – Laurie Kellogg

Laurie Kellogg - The Parent Pact  artwork

The Parent Pact

Return to Redemption Series Book Three

Laurie Kellogg

Genre: Contemporary

Publish Date: September 12, 2012

Publisher: LK Books

Seller: Lauren Kellogg


Cinderella and Prince Charming never had to consider the welfare of their children When widower Tyler Fitzpatrick meets Annie Barnes at his daughter’s school, his libido goes tilt. The sexy single mother is everything he and his grieving little girl need. Unfortunately, Annie flatly refuses his dinner invitation. She wants a husband and a father for her son—not just a boyfriend. And the last time she checked, wealthy, summa-cum-laude lawyers didn’t marry high-school-drop-out housekeepers. Tyler concedes there’s a vast difference between their experiences and lifestyles. Still, he’s inexplicably drawn to the impoverished young woman—even though her little boy reminds Tyler of an underprivileged past he’d rather forget. While becoming better acquainted, he offers Annie a job caring for his daughter and home in Redemption, PA. He also proposes a Parent Pact—an agreement to become role models to each other’s child and to fill one another’s needs as single parents while they continue to search for true love. Accepting Tyler’s offer would solve a lot of Annie’s problems. However, surrendering to her weak-in-the-knees attraction to the irresistible widower could very well leave her and her son heartbroken. Yet, when circumstances threaten her ability to feed her child, Annie reluctantly agrees to the pact, making it clear she has no desire for Tyler to fill her so-called needs in bed. It’s a bald-faced lie, but she knows the man’s desperation to give his daughter the nurturing she needs will compel him to accept a purely platonic relationship. Now, Annie’s only problem is resisting the overwhelming temptation to let sin-in-a-tailored-suit Tyler seduce her.

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Your Gay vs. My Gay: Coming Out and Becoming a Better Parent

I came out in the early 1980s — into a thriving lesbian community that was fueled by the feminist movement and had some overlap with the gay male community. I always knew that there were different realities for gay people and that many still were in the closet. I dismissed these realities as not being connected to mine. It wasn’t until I met Bonnie Kaye, M.Ed., and read her books (her latest is a memoir, Jennifer, Needle in Her Arm: Healing From the Hell of My Daughter’s Drug Addiction) that I began to reconsider.

Kaye is an internationally known author and counselor to straight women who are married to gay men. She also counsels closeted gay men on how honesty can help them and their female spouses.

An opinion piece in The New York Times reports that “the openly gay population is dramatically higher in more tolerant states….” Based on factual research, the author concludes, “The evidence also suggests that a large number of gay men are married to women.”

Of course, there are also many closeted lesbians who are married to straight men, something that was documented on The Huffington Post.

There are many similarities, but there are also some differences. Every relationship is different. But I came to the conclusion that homophobia is hurting us all — the straight spouses, the closeted gay or lesbian spouse, the children and particularly the children of closeted gay parents who identify as LGBTQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or questioning). Ultimately I was left with more questions than answers. Here Bonnie answers them.

Janet Mason: Could you please explain the nature of your counseling work and how you came to be involved with it?

Bonnie Kaye, M.Ed.: My counseling work specializes in straight women who unknowingly married gay men, and gay men who were hoping they were straight and believed marriage would “cure” those attractions for other men. I started this counseling after the end of my own marriage to a gay man in 1978. Since that time, I have worked with over 100,000 people in this situation, 96 percent women and 4 percent gay men. I currently have a mailing list of over 7,000 people who receive my monthly newsletter.

Mason: What are some of the signs that straight women might be involved with and married to gay men?

Kaye: I have a checklist that is on my website at gayhusbands.com. The checklist includes a decline in sexual activity early in the marriage, a lack of interest in foreplay, unexplained absences of their husbands, a lack of emotional intimacy, viewing gay porn, extensive homophobic remarks, stating he’s “confused,” and accusing his wife of being too sexually aggressive.

Mason: When a woman discovers that her husband is gay, does the marriage necessarily have to end?

Kaye: I believe these marriages are toxic. Marriages are based on honest communication, intimacy on a physical and emotional level, and fidelity. A gay husband isn’t able to provide this to a woman in a sustaining way, as his urges to be with men heighten as the years go on. In many cases, the husband becomes either emotionally or physically abusive due to his frustration of being in the wrong place with the wrong gender. The marriage needs to end because both parties are losing out on what they deserve. However, families can be “redefined” after divorce and remain close as each partner has a chance to find his and her true soul mate.

Mason: Watching the HuffPost Live segment on the Straight Spouse Network, I noticed two things in particular. A gay man mentioned that he became a much better father after he came out, and a straight woman mentioned that her closeted gay ex-husband was homophobic for the 15 years of the marriage before he came out. What are your thoughts on this?

Kaye: Living a lie takes its toll on the whole family unit. They say that secrets destroy families, and this is certainly true. Most children are so sophisticated today that they learn the secret before their mothers do. Then they become keepers of the secret, which tears them apart. If they tell their mothers, they fear it will destroy her life. If they don’t tell her, they feel a sense of betrayal because their father is cheating.

Mason: There is an apt saying: “You’re only as sick as your secrets.” I’ve known several lesbian friends who have unsupportive closeted gay fathers. Could you elaborate on how having a closeted gay parent can be particularly damaging to someone who identifies as LGBTQ?

Kaye: Children who are gay struggle so much more with dishonest gay parents. Children can sense or know when they have a gay father. His rejection of their homosexuality makes their struggle that much more difficult. They start feeling that “If even my gay father won’t accept me, how will others?” In my recent book about my lesbian daughter’s life and early death from drugs, Jennifer, Needle in her Arm, I discuss how her gay father’s rejection of her lesbianism hurt her deeply. He called her dirty names on a regular basis and told her to make sure not to tell any of his business associates, in case they would think he was gay.

Mason: Obviously, society has to change for the temptation to pass as straight to lose its appeal. Meanwhile, straight spouses of gay partners have to protect themselves. Do you have any final words of advice?

Kaye: Straight spouses need to find support to go through this grieving process in order to move on. Gay partners have to learn that they have the responsibility to help with the collateral family damage that will take place once this revelation is out. The beginning is always filled with turmoil and angry feelings, but the goal should be to redefine the family but work together as much as possible. Sadly, many gay partners are so happy to finally be “free” they pursue what they feel they’ve missed for so many years and don’t provide that support.
Divorce – The Huffington Post

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