A master at work.
A good friend was waiting nearby while his young son prayed silently before going to bed. Suddenly the boy burst out laughing.
“Reggie!” scolded his father, “Why are you laughing during prayer?”
“But Dad,” the boy answered, “you told me that prayer is talking to God as to a friend, and I just told him a joke.”
Received from Loron Wade.
The Good, Clean Funnies List
© © 2017 – Meridian Entertainment (USA) LLC
The Wednesday-night church service coincided with the last day of hunting season.
Our pastor asked who had bagged a deer.
No one raised a hand.
Puzzled, the pastor said, “I don’t get it. Last Sunday many of you said you were missing because of hunting season. I had the whole congregation pray
for your deer.”
One hunter groaned, “Well, it worked. They’re all safe.”
Received from Pastor Tim.
The Good, Clean Funnies List
Trump Prays About DACA On National Pr… 1:20
What Donald Trump was really praying for on this years National Prayer Day.
Submitted by: Funny Or Die
Keywords: Donald Trump DACA Mexicans Illegal Immigrants Children National Prayer Day Parody Praying Inner Monologue
This is Amy Schumer's year! The 34-year-old comedian will be opening Madonna's New York City shows with her stand-up routine, but will she also be singing?
News, reviews, interviews and more for top artists and albums – MSN Music
ADULT ENTERTAINMENT NEWS UPDATE:Gabby Love’s top pick! Click and enjoy!
Dial a Prayer (2015)
Cast includes: Brittany Snow (Pitch Perfect), William H. Macy (Shameless), Tom Lipinski (Labor Day), Glenne Headly (Don Jon), Aral Gribble (Loading Zone)
Writer/Director: Maggie Kiley (Brightest Star)
Genre: Comedy | Drama (97 minutes)
With “Lead Me Gently Home” playing on the sound track, we hear a mellow voice saying, “With God, all things are possible.” We realize we’re looking at a phone bank with about a dozen mellow-voiced counselors talking to callers. On the other hand… “Dial A Prayer. How may I pray for you?” says Cora… without a molecule of conviction. As we soon learn, it’s Cora’s first day, and frankly, she need a lot of training. “Daily Devotional is offering a free trial.” “It’s another record week at Dial A Prayer,” supervisor Bill announces over iced lemon cake. Yum! “The work you do redeems you with the Lord. You’re serving the master… God, not me!” Oh, Bill’s such a joker at times! Dial A Prayer is going to be extra busy with all the holiday needs coming up. But Bill knows they’ll be up to the challenge. What he really wants to know about is Cora’s serve. Serve? “Volleyball. If you can answer the call, you’d better join the league.”
At 4:00 sharp, Cora is out the door… but not so fast. Bill catches up and gives her the company T-shirt. Cora is creeped out by the whole place. Days later when sneaking out back for a cig break, she encounters a young man who’s been looking for her. “You’re the one I spoke to. I’m Chase…” as if Cora is supposed to remember everyone she prays for. Apparently, Cora helped him find his way. However, it’s obviously Cora who needs navigation, because she’s just going through the motions. In flashbacks, we begin to see that Cora isn’t working at Dial A Prayer by choice. She’s doing time for that church vandalism incident that went terribly wrong. “We’re allowing you to repent.” How long is she going to have to work with “those freaks?” she wonders. “Don’t think you can just go through the motions and get away with it,” Bill warns her. After some soul searching, Cora decides to put some effort into her job. “Everyday is a new beginning.”
Dial a Prayer is the second feature film by writer/director, Maggie Kiley. It’s an enjoyable hour and a half; even though Cora, the central character, seems to mope through life… always as dreary as the interminable Michigan winter. Although the film feels highly independent, the script was good enough to bring in actor William H. Macy, who does an excellent job as Bill, the sometimes unnaturally chipper supervisor. Obviously, the world of a prayer phone bank provides abundant opportunity for either cynicism or sermonizing, but the film avoids both… which could be a disappointment for audiences who are hoping for either of those points of view. As the plot thickens, we see that Cora existence in this world touches others, even though she seems to feel nothing she does matters. “Nothing is impossible with God,” says Bill. “Maybe believing it’s working is enough.” The script capitalizes on virtually every religious slogan there is, but perhaps a woman who doesn’t work at Dial A Prayer sums it up best… “It’s ok. I’m ok. It’s all ok.”
2 popped kernels (Scale: 0-4)
A young woman serves time for a crime by answering phones at a prayer phone bank
Audience: Young Adults
Gender Style: Neutral
Distribution: Art House & Video
Tempo: In No Hurry
Visual Style: Unvarnished Realism
Nutshell: Prayer phone bank
Language: True to life
Social Significance: Thought Provoking
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Hot Tip Alert!
Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal skipped an Iowa stage crowded with Republican presidential wannabes on Saturday so he could host a prayer rally on the campus of Louisiana State University. Jindal and others have mischaracterized objections to the rally, suggesting that its critics were somehow out to silence people of faith. So let’s be clear about the real issue: Bobby Jindal used the power and prestige of his office to promote an event backed by some of the nation’s most religiously divisive and stridently anti-gay activists. And in a bid to boost his own political future, he sent a clear message of support for the Christian-nation views of the event’s extremist organizers.
Christians Only, Please
Let’s start with the invitation, sent on Jindal’s official state letterhead. “We are in need of spiritual and transforming revival,” he wrote, “if we are to recapture the vision of our early leaders who signed on the Mayflower, ‘In the name of God and for the advancement of the Christian faith.'” Leadership to solve the country’s problems “will not come from a politician or a movement for social change,” he wrote in this time civil rights movement anniversaries. So how will we solve our problems? “Jesus Christ, Son of God and the Lord of Life, is America’s only hope.” In a separate letter he wrote to the other 49 governors inviting them to his rally to pray for “spiritual revival” and “heaven’s intervention” over the country. “There will only be one name lifted up that day — Jesus!”
What does all this suggest to non-Christian Americans (including non-Christian governors) about how Jindal views their contributions? Jindal’s letters reflect the attitudes of rally organizer David Lane, a political strategist who believes America was founded by and for Christians. The event was paid for by the American Family Association, whose chief spokesman, radio host Bryan Fischer, believes the First Amendment’s religious liberty protections apply only to Christians.
The rally was also a showcase for the dominionist views of self-proclaimed “apostles” who promoted and spearheaded the event. One of those “apostles” was the event’s emcee. Doug Stringer has called the 9/11 attacks “a wake-up call” that happened because God was not around to defend America due to abortion, homosexuality, and kicking God out of public schools. While introducing Jindal, Stringer made a brief mention of “Seven Mountains” theology, which states that all the “mountains” in society — arenas like business, entertainment, and government — must be led by the right kind of Christian. A later speaker, Gene Mills of the Louisiana Family Forum, spent more time on the “Seven Mountains.” Mills said these spheres of influence belong to God but are currently occupied by the “enemy.” They therefore need to be evangelized and “occupied by the body of Christ.”
Not Political? Not Credible
Jindal and organizer David Lane declared, unbelievably, that the rally was not political. Lane is a self-described political strategist who works to turn conservative evangelical churches into voter turnout machines for right-wing candidates and causes. Lane is trying to get 1,000 conservative evangelical pastors to run for public office, and he held a recruiting session the day before the prayer rally. Jindal and Sen. James Lankford of Oklahoma were among the speakers. Another example of the disconnect between rhetoric and reality: Stringer made the claim that the rally was not meant to lift up any politicians while he was standing in front of a huge screen featuring a quote from Bobby Jindal.
The “not political” claim was hard to take seriously given the amount of time devoted to making abortion illegal and declarations that what will tip the scales will be the “the voice of the church in the voting booth.” Jim Garlow, who led church organizing for California’s anti-gay Proposition 8, and who believes the marriage equality movement is demonic, dropped all “nonpolitical” pretense, railing against marriage equality and IRS regulations that restrict the involvement of churches in electoral politics.
Opponents = Enemies
One of the biggest problems with treating politics as spiritual warfare is that you turn your political opponents into spiritual enemies. People who disagree with you on public policy issues are not just wrong but evil, or even satanic. That makes it pretty hard to work together or find compromise.
In daily prayer calls leading up to the rally, organizers prayed for God to forgive students who were organizing protests, as if disagreeing with Bobby Jindal were a sin — or a form of anti-Christian persecution. “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do,” prayed call leaders, comparing their pleas to Jesus asking God to forgive those who crucified him, and Saint Stephen asking for mercy for those who were stoning him to death. On one call, a prayer leader decreed a “no-go zone for demons” over the sports arena where the event was to be held. At the rally, one speaker talked of storming the gates of Hell. Bishop Harry Jackson finished his remarks by leading the crowd in a chant he has used at anti-gay rallies: “Let God arise and his enemies be scattered!”
Jindal Unplugged, Unhinged, and Unapologetic
Jindal seems to have decided that his best chance in a crowded Republican field is to plant himself at the far right of an already far-right group. In the days leading up to the rally, he drew criticism for comments denigrating Muslims and for repeating bogus charges about Muslim “no-go zones” that Fox News had already apologized for spreading. During a radio interview a few days before the rally, Jindal said liberals pretend that jihadist terrorism isn’t happening and pretend “it’s a good thing to kill journalists, to kill teenagers for watching soccer, to kill over 150 schoolchildren, to treat women as second-class citizens….” He decried political incorrectness and multiculturalism and said of immigrants who do not embrace American exceptionalism, “That’s not immigration; that’s invasion.”
On “This Week” on Sunday, ABC’s George Stephanopoulos noted that Jindal had declared at his prayer rally that “on the last page, our God wins,” and asked him if that was appropriate in a religiously diverse country. Jindal praised religious liberty but ducked the question.
On the same show, Jindal said he would back a push for an amendment to the U.S. Constitution to allow states to discriminate against same-sex couples, all while saying, “I am not for discrimination against anybody.” (Jindal describes himself as an “evangelical Catholic,” and his contradictory rhetoric parallels the language of the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, which says it opposes “unjust discrimination” against gay people but defines the term “unjust discrimination” in a way that applies only to those people with “same-sex attraction” who remain celibate.)
Jindal has also promoted far-right policies as governor. As Brian Tashman at Right Wing Watch has noted:
Jindal has reached out to the party’s increasingly extreme base by undermining the teaching of evolution in public schools; promoting wild conspiracy theories about Common Core, an effort to adjust school standards that he supported before it became the target of the Tea Party’s fury; and hyping the purported persecution of Christians in America, specifically citing the plight of Christians with reality television shows.
Jindal’s rally was not an original idea. In fact Jindal’s “Response” recycled materials and themes from a similar event that Texas Gov. Rick Perry held in 2011 to launch his presidential bid. Here’s what I wrote about Perry’s event, which applies equally well to Jindal’s — not surprising since both were organized by the same groups of extremists:
Organizers argued (unconvincingly) that “The Response” was about prayer, not politics. But groups like the American Family Association (AFA), which paid for the rally and its webcast … are not designed to win souls but to change American law and culture through grassroots organizing and political power-building. They have a corrosive effect on our political culture by promoting religious bigotry and anti-gay extremism, by claiming that the United States was meant to be a Christian nation, and by fostering resentment among conservative evangelicals with repeated false assertions that liberal elites are out to destroy religious liberty and silence conservative religious voices.
Jindal, of course, has the right to talk about his faith. But it is wrong for him to use his public office to proselytize and denigrate the faith of others. Teaming up with anti-gay extremists and Christian-nation advocates gives them credibility they do not deserve. His actions speak volumes about his judgment, values, and commitment to religious pluralism and equality under the law.
Gay Voices – The Huffington Post
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Final Prayer Official VOD Trailer 1 (2015) – Horror Movie HD
AVAILABLE on DVD and Digital HD 2/24! Pre-order Now: http://bit.ly/FPdvd
SUMMARY: When a church in a remote area reports strange happenings, a team of Vatican investigators descends upon it to demystify the unusual sounds and events, but what they discover is more disturbing than they had first imagined.
“final prayer” “final prayer movie” “final prayer trailer” horror mystery “Elliot Goldner” “Gordon Kennedy” “Robin Hill” “Aidan McArdle” church vatican investigators vchan
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